some thoughts on TRUST

i never really thought i was a control freak...until i realized how unnerved i get when things are spinning out of control. i am reading a book that is challenging me to really think about whether or not i trust God...or wheather i simply trust my fortunate circumstances. do i really believe that in the dark times God is in control, still good, still powerful? I am rethinking how i pray too...the listmaking...i think that comes more out of my need to tell God how it needs to be, how to fix stuff and make it right...less out of my desire to hear from him...to worship him. there is a line in The Lion, Witch and the Wardrobe where Mr. Tumnus explains to Lucy that Aslan is not a tame lion. I do believe that God is loving but i am learning in my adult life that his goodness is not always going to make me happy in the here and now. His desire is that we find our rest and joy in Him...not our blessings, not our comfy couch, not even our children or spouses...simply in him, whose love is unchanging...who is on the move in this world...in the heartwrenching poverty, in the luxurious penthouses of the rich. to deny his work would be wrong. i need to pray for a heart that trusts God--that i might be a woman of courage and strength, willing to accomplish every good work that he has called me to.

a day at the fair

we had a great day at the fair a couple of weeks ago. a hot midwest day, hazy heat pounded our bodies while we filled our tummies with soda, kettle corn, hot dogs, corn on the cob and later...stomach pains. dave and toby rode lots of rides (i think the scary reality is that they might fall down!) and laughed all the way down the mouse trap ride...dave had no idea that those little cars spin around and around...really fast! it was VERY funny to watch! i dragged everyone into the horse barn and made dave walk "all the way across the street" with dragging feet and a lot of eye rolling to see the baby pigs. i still think they were worth it...so cute and made me really glad i am not a mother pig. those piglets are aggressive eaters! see, there is always something to be grateful for!

on an island in the sun, we'll be playin' and havin' fun

maine '07

crazy long car trip!
salty breeze
swimming
hiking
canoeing
campfire and smores
tents
cabin...ants, giant mosquitoes
windswept
reading (whenever you can!)
family
bar harbor for ice cream
pilgrim inn with dave
sand beach
grasshopper shop
the rock on hamilton shore that looks like a lobster boat
huge crabs, starfish, hermit crabs, seals, seagulls
stinky rock
our island adventure with the kids and the canoe
freeport with the goges
playing in the mud with toby
blueberry muffins
cocktails by the sea
joshua's new found love for soccer
a beautiful moonrise


what i really love about maine is that it never really changes. the same big rocks line the shoreline today as they did when i was a little girl. the cottages remain the same too, for better or worse, with the same smells and perhaps generations of rodents and mosquitoes too. in maine i get a brief chance to reflect on my life...how much i have grown and changed over the years...there is a time for thoughtfulness there...and no time or even opportunity for internet distractions:) i can become a child again sharing all the secrets with my little guys about where to find the biggest crabs, how to skip rocks, play uno, read through a rainy day, take long walks on the beach, find seaglass, and not slip on the seaweed. it was a great trip...i have already forgotten the car ride there and back...